He executes justice for the oppressed and gives food to the hungry. The LORD sets prisoners free, the LORD gives sight to the blind, he lifts up those who are bowed down, the LORD loves those who live justly. The LORD watches over the immigrant and sustains the fatherless and the widow, but he frustrates the ways of the wicked. -Psalm 146:7-9

Friday, December 26, 2008

Deja Vu

Yes...its 4:48am and I am writing a blog...
you know its crazy how you wake up in the morning with all your plans and preparations for the day...you already have it set in your mind what your day will look like..you take that scripture that says a man plans his ways and you just leave it at that...LOL
OH I know friends... I have done it waaay to many times.

Today was our first Christmas in the hood, and it was a very busy one at that... Let me make something clear...when I write my blogs I am in NO WAY wanting to brag, boast, or put myself on display...please friends, I beseech you to see the CROSS, to place your focus there as you read whatever it is I am writing about...
Kevin and I had a total of 20-30 people in our home today..In and out the doors were revolving with neighbors wanting to get a taste of some fried turkey and my husbands famous mac and cheese..yes....The LORD brought them in by the car full

It was fun, exciting, all that you could ever expect when you know that you are doing what the LORD wants you to and in the manner in which he has called you to do it.
Well, things begin to go in a direction I was not expecting this day to go... Around 8 or 9 oclock tonight..one of the teen girls that we are VERY CLOSE with went to the bathroom..( okay..this thing with teens and bathrooms is REALLY starting to freak me out..why???? read this story here )

Anyway...next thing I know some of the smaller boys that Kevin and BK have bible study with started to yell and tell me that the girl is in the bathroom yelling for me. I leave the room to see what is going and my husband is picking her up from off of the floor..there is vomit everywhere in the bathroom..from the walls to the sink....she faints.....i smell blood....he scoops her up to the car and they race off to the nearest hospital... what in the world JESUS!!!!???????

I decided then to clear out my house, which is a wreck and full of guest so that I can be with them and her mom at the hospital...i get a phone call from Kevin and that when I feel as if I am living in a dream...Kevin begins to explain to me that the doctors seem to believe that this girl is having a miscarriage...she tells the nurse that she had not had her period sense October..... what???? It makes sense now...the stomach pains...the abnormal eating habits....the vomiting..... I just lost it.. i think I had a panic attack on the phone...the tears begin to flow....

Her sister and my self rush to the hospital to find out that she was having a ectopic pregnancy and had to be admitted for a emergency operation..her stomach was full of blood..this girl should not have survived the condition she was in....they told her due to previous miscarriages that after this surgery that it would be VERY difficult for her to EVER have children....
I lost it again.....

You know I have been praying constantly for the LORD to shake the world of these girls...to bring them to their lowest for them to see their need for him... JESUS this is not what I meant.....I am so burden this morning friends.. I just walked in my door at 4:15 this morning...I was at the hospital waiting for her to come out of surgery..she was sooo afraid..she just kept saying to me " Nicole I am soo scared, I am scared" I told her that I would be here praying for her until she came through..

the baby daddy...NO GOOD!!! His response was to her mom " I thought she was on her pills, what happen to her taking her pills??" He came to the hospital for 10 minutes and then left to go to a night club with his buddies.. are you kidding me??? SERIOUSLY????
foreal, I have to move on because anything after this will be slander....

One of my friends that came by to keep kaiya for me to go to hospital was struggling with the fact that the younger sister was not effected by all this...she was showing no emotion...I begin to weep and tell her that its sad because there is no connection for this kids...there is a mental block on things like this and more because it is such of the norm for them.. how sad and scary at the same time....



WE need your prayers.. WE need the LORD to show us how to be here yet again for this same family the same way were were when this happen the first time with the younger sister.....I am drained...emotionally this one was the hardest..#1- because this young girl is in love with a man that will never love her as CHRIST does...she does not get it...she kicked us out of the hospital room because she said he was coming back to stay there with her..her mom and I get to the elevator to call him and he is still at the club and says that he told her he was not coming because she needed to go to sleep..she lied to us to get us out the room to call him to come...she was trying to convince him to be there for her...#2- there is a relationship now that has become deeper between us all....

Pray that the LORD uses this to draw her..

I have no more words...I cant even keep my eyes open to finish typing this
I will leave you with this verse from colossians that keeps coming to mind :


Colossians 1

5He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. 16For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. 17He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. 18And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. 19For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, 20and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.....


CHRIST reigns SUPREME over this situation as hard as it was..it has not taken him by surprise.... To this end I labor, struggling with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me