Pretenders

 Well hello blog land! It's been a while since I've been in this part of town and to be honest,  I've missed it. I'd love to bring you up to date as to what's going on with me and my family. But for now, here's a blog post  that was written some time last year that I never clicked "done" on until now. It's very much still relevant today. My prayer is that it would continue a conversation that is long over due amongst ministries, churches and friendships. 

Let's get it ! 


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As I was driving back from dropping my daughter off at ballet class, I begin to notice all the construction going on around me. I mean, my neighborhood is crazy right about now. Roads are being torn up and repaved, abandoned houses being knocked down and or re boarded. New trees are being planted, places that were once  tagged with gang signs and profanity graffiti is replaced with fresh coats of paint. I know you may be thinking, that sounds GREAT. The neighborhood is getting an uplift!!! But for some reason, I don't feel great, I feel.....burdened, confused and frustrated.

Let me explain.


March 2015 is the 50th anniversary of the Selma to Montgomery March and my hood is a key location to this celebration. I'm talking about so key, that a block up from my house is where some of the marchers camped out before heading to the state capital down town. In addition to that, my husband and I were told some of the marchers were housed in our very home by neighbors. It's been a joy and a privilege to hear all the amazing stories of what has taken place where we are.

While I look forward to celebrating the anniversary of such a momentous event, I often wonder where was all of this "fixing up" help years ago. Or what will happen once the national coverage leaves our community, or when the actual event is over. Which of our city officials will care about the up keeping of our roads, abandoned  homes and ect. then?

When I sit and look around at what's happening  in my hood, I also think about a deeper issue that is running rampant in the church( America in general) and has been for some time. The issue I would like to call PRETENDING. (or as many friends know I love to say, FAKENESS) 

You see, in the church today, we love walking around pretending that problems don't exists. Both in our own personal lives or in the world around us. We somehow  have believed the lie that if I just ignore a situation then it'll no longer be an issue later on. Some of us have really seared our conscious so much so, that we really don't see the problems before us and have become so blind to the issues surfacing. Historically, many of us who are NOT African American have the luxury of NOT having to live in the reality of there being a problem, while others in the church have to be reminded of that on a DAILY basis.

Scripture gives us so many instructions on how to deal with "problems". No matter what the situation is, we biblically have no excuse what so ever to walk around acting as if relationships aren't broken, lacking unity amongst co- workers or just sitting in pain from past situations. . It's due to the church not "keeping it real" that we have jacked up our witness with people who come from the outside looking for real and authentic community.

One of my biggest struggles before Christ was being a liar. When I tell you I was slick with it, baby I was slick!!  After walking into this newness of life and transferring into a NEW kingdom, I knew right away that was a part of my life I couldn't any longer live. I HATE lies, and even now  as a believer the struggle and temptation still exist it's something that I just can't stand playing a part in any relationship that I have. I think one of the ways we can kill unity or this idea of the church being a family is to lie, or "pretend" someone else's  pain, experiences, or feelings don't matter or don't exists.  To be apart of a family that makes you feel as if your "crazy", "the only one" or "making a big deal" of things I would say not only is painful but goes against what it means to really love your brother or sister as yourself.  

The truth is, sometimes it's hard for us to accept the experiences, or pain of those we are living amongst or working with because then, it just may mean I have to look deep within myself and figure out how I played a role (if any) in what they're  feeling. 

The question today is how authentic are the relationships around you? And what  role are you playing in the restoration of what's broken? 

Are you keeping it REAL?!


Matthew 22:37-40

And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”



1 Corinthians 12:25-27

That there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together. Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.